Three questions for us, leaders, as we leg out the remainder of 2024 and round the corner into the new year.
Do we know we have limits as leaders?
Do we know what those limits are?
Do we know where to run when we reach those limits?
These three questions form a logical staircase. If the answer to the first is “no,” then we will not descend to the second question. And if answer to the second question is “no,” then we cannot descend to the third question.
The first question addresses comprehension. This question is intended to be rhetorical. However, if your honest answer is something akin to “I truly don’t think I have any limits as a leader,” then, well…thanks for your honesty. And time for you to exit (preferably immediately) whatever positional leadership role you occupy.
The second question addresses self-awareness. Simply affirming that we possess limitations as leaders does not demonstrate anything beyond a basic understanding of leading — and humanity. But having concrete answers to the second question demonstrates that we do take (have taken) the time to know ourselves…to lead ourselves. I’m persuaded that self-awareness is the first function of a leader, for without accurate self-awareness we cannot have accurate others-awareness (among many other things mandatory for leading well). Relatedly, as a friend/mentor of mine often says, if we don’t take the time to first work on [lead] ourselves, then we have no business working on others.
The third question address humility. Recognizing our specific limitations as leaders makes us more effective. But doing something about those limitations makes us more transformative. Here’s why: Transformation concerns growth, change. If we are only aware of our leadership limits — no matter how keenly — but take no action concerning them, we will not grow beyond those limitations. And if we can’t grow, change, doesn’t that indicate that neither can we help others grow, change — which is the essence of transformational leadership?
Now, you may ask what humility has to do with (taking) action? Fair question…and in this context — concerning one’s limitations — everything.
Only humility will compel leaders to identify in advance someone who can assist them them when they reach their limits. Only humility will compel leaders to run (or maybe even: to crawl) to that person for help when they reach their limits. And only humility will compel leaders to remain under the tutelage/counsel/coaching of that person until a particular limitation has been addressed and/or overcome.
For me, 2024 has been a year of running, limping, and crawling to a host of others for assistance with abundant limitations…as a leader, as a husband, as a father, as a friend. My ineptitude and brokenness have been on full display, which is not at all enjoyable.
But is entirely appropriate.
For transparency begets healing — resultant from inviting others into our struggles.
These past months, others have not only provided me strength but also, on some days, been the entirety of my strength. They have “grabbed me by the facemask,” challenging me sometimes to stand up, sometimes to shut up. They have — graciously — helped me see truth. And in truth is freedom (as famously stated by a leader whom we celebrate this time of year).
Of course, we’ll never be completely free from limitations. Not in this life. Know that.
But also know that only through others can we be free from the effects of our limitations, whether forever or for a period of time.
Leaders, we need help. At the least, we will need help. At some point, for some reason, our capacity will fail to deliver, our best will not be enough. This is our common experience. This is our universal imperfection.
So know you have limits.
Know what those are.
And most importantly, know where you’ll run.
To Where Will You Run? was originally published in Horizon Performance on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
