Seizing Meaningful Impact

The Value of a Single Encounter

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ― Maya Angelou

Last month, I was parked at the airport terminal, awaiting my daughter’s arrival, when a man of at least eighty years approached my truck, wearing a fluorescent yellow airport vest and pin-adorned hat.

I was about to meet Mr. Osbourne.

And I bristled in anticipation…because I was waiting in an area where cars are not allowed to wait, so I figured he was going to tell me to move along. But moving me along was not on Mr. Osbourne’s agenda that morning. Quite the contrary.

Mr. Osbourne wanted to talk.

In fact, he rested his elbows on the edge of my truck’s open window and leaned in — squarely focused on me and seemingly unconcerned about the goings-on at the terminal. His posture pushed the boundaries of personal space…but felt comforting at the same time.

Because he leaned in, I was able to get a close look at Mr. Osbourne’s cap, and I noticed he was a veteran.

A soon-to-be military retiree myself, I commented on his pin collection and asked him about his service. His eyes lit up and he was quick with a few stories, including his time as a driver at Fort Meade, Maryland. While there, the captain whom he drove around tried to convince Mr. Osbourne to re-enlist, and his time was involuntarily extended prior to the end of his service. After I shared that I was soon retiring from the Army, he retrieved a plastic baggie with an assortment of additional pins that clearly he was saving for such occasions.

Now, Mr. Osbourne had nothing to gain from me. He likely had numerous similar exchanges every day. And our conversation lasted maybe seven minutes.

But I’ll never forget him.

Why? Because he made a meaningful impact on me in a single interaction.

I have served with some incredible leaders, both military and civilian, and I have witnessed them make everyone with whom they interact feel as if he/she is the most important person in the world. Treating people as if they truly matter, letting them know that they are a valuable teammate, and genuinely caring about conversations can be a magical leadership formula. The return on investment for these very simple gestures can be astronomical.

In his book, Unreasonable Hospitality, Will Guidara applies this formula to the restaurant industry. More broadly, he contends that we can, in whatever industry we work, choose to be in the hospitality industry. To make every team member feel valued, cared for, and appreciated is essential to creating a safe environment in which others can thrive. Psychological safety, dignity, and respect in the workplace are important.

I get it: All of this “feelings” talk can come across as overly soft for type A leaders. After all, who cares about workers’ feelings? Well, workers do. And you should, too. Not only because you want your team members to be happy and your team to have harmony (those things are also important) but also because creating an environment wherein a team can thrive is a leader’s responsibility.

A great way to start building that environment is to never take for granted any single interaction you have.

A leader’s presence matters, and followers are always watching. As leaders ascend in their careers, the organizations they lead get bigger and the stress greater — but the personal interactions with teammates become fewer. In fact, a common pitfall of senior leaders is to lose sight of each individual employee’s value and the making people feel valued, cared for, and appreciated is necessary.

The impact of the single encounter goes far beyond that single person, however. Don’t think of a single interaction as influencing your organization one employee at a time; creating a positive and encouraging work environment starts with one interaction that gains momentum through your entire organization. You shape your environment by the tone you set: How you treat your team will be how your team members treat one another.

We’ve all worked for “that” leader. You know, the one you rarely see, and when you finally do, he’s too busy for you. The only time she does find time is when you’ve made a mistake, shown initiative, or done something not explicitly directed. What is your level of respect for that leader? More importantly, how inspired are you to push yourself for the organization, to do something without being told for the good of the organization, or to devise creative ways to make the organization better?

Depending on your environment or the size of your organization, that single encounter may be the only time a teammate sees a particular leader in person. For instance, I recently heard a story about a boss who was making the rounds and arrived at a situation he knew nothing about; he made a sarcastic remark about how the situation was being handled and departed. Possibly, then, those employees who had never met this leader in person and were left — forever — with the impression that the boss is a sarcastic jerk. No one wants to give his/her all for a sarcastic jerk.

Conversely, I’ve seen the best leaders with every minute of their day accounted for give a subordinate every ounce of their attention. The effect is immeasurable. You can see the loyalty in that teammate grow and watch as his/her commitment to that leader, and the organization, solidify.

You might only get one shot to do the right thing. And this is the right thing.

I received no better satisfaction during my military career than to have a former teammate, especially one I didn’t know well (or at all), reach out years later to thank me for some gesture, lesson, or engagement that I hardly remember (if at all). Which goes to show that when we take the time to genuinely engage any and every member of our organization, we can have meaningful impact.

So, thank you, Mr. Osborne.